Yeah, Hopey...you are finally looking a lot better. Hope was able to enjoy cuddles and sitting up in her KidKart yesterday, for the first time in weeks. It has taken her 3 1/2 weeks to recover from the latest vomitting episode and I am so glad she didn't follow Ashley's lead! It has definitely been a sobering thought, that we might lose both girls in such a short time. We've been slowly moving out some of Ashley's stuff, which hasn't been as bad as you might imagine, but it would be horrible if we were giving up everything for both girls.
It might be helpful for people to know that we really are OKAY. Yes, losing a child is a very hard thing, and we will be dealing with this loss for years. But we have also been grieving in small doses, for six years, which gave us time to love Ashley and accept her limited time with us. Nothing was taken for granted and each year was cherished. So, right now I will tell you that we are feeling fine...but I will reserve the right to change that sentiment in the future. I just have no idea how I will feel in the months to come. So, if I start crying for some reason...months or years down the road...I'll trust that you will remember that grieving is not predictable. Also, it's okay that you may not know what to say to us, because we don't know what to say back! A hug is always safe.
Now, back to the normal stuff. We celebrated the beautiful weather yesterday by hosting some of the neighbourhood kids. You can see Brodie in his Calgary Flames jersey below. Mira was mesmerized by the hockey game in our driveway!
This morning we went to church and Hope slept through the whole service, but she looked cute anyway! When we got home, we got her into position for some tummy time and Brodie promptly scooted in to cuddle with her. He's such a great kid.
Thank you SO MUCH, to those who sent food (but we don't need anymore). I had no idea how much work and decision making was involved with funeral planning. The food that came after Ashley died was an incredible help and more than that, it was such a treat. It was all so, so tasty and I definitely think food is a comfort. I had no time or energy for meal planning or prep, so it may have been a KD week otherwise.
Just one more 'Thank You'. We have recieved many e-card notices when donations were made to RCC in Ashley's name and this is appreciated and applauded. Thank you so much!
5 comments:
I loved your post today. So glad that Hope is doing better. I think of you often. Cant wait till the next time we meet and hopefully I wont be sick then! Love you lots.
Yeah for a happy day! We are so glad for good news & a great day! Spring is coming :)
Hi Jolene. I was getting worried when so many days went by without a post. You've said all the right things in helping those of us who feel kinda awkward and "useless". I'm glad you've got some more time with Hope; pretty soon you'll be back at work and get all those paid breaks!
Glad to hear you are okay. I will continue to pray, and am so thankful for the peace you are feeling. Love you! Love the pictures.
-Elise
So pleased to hear that Hope is doing much better. She only opened her eyes once for a second when I was over on Friday. I was'nt looking forward to going over when my special girl wasn't there but it was a lot better than I was expecting. I understand when you say that you will still likely have bad days and sad days because I am still going through the grieving stage at times. Hope to get over for a visit the next time I am in Winnipeg.
Marie McConnell
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