Blue

Well, normally I like the colour blue, but I'm not liking it on Hope.  She's turning blue (mouth, hands, feet) today with her seizures and with each turn.  She's still not waking up.

On the upside, Brodie had a great time at the farm with Grandma and Grandpa Allen.  Fortunately, he got home in time to see Mira start crawling.  Yay, for Mira.  Not so 'yay' for me, who now has to 'baby proof', and find all the dust bunnies before she does.  Then again, maybe I could just tie swiffer cloths to her knees and let her take care of the floor!  Te He!

Today, I started a list.  Surprise, surprise...I know.  The list is labled, 'Helpers', because I can't seem to remember to ask for help when things get tough, and even if I think to ask, I usually can't think who I should ask (despite the many wonderful people who have offered help over the years).  So, I've started this list, and if you want to be on it, you can email me. 

I am preparing for the difficulty of losing Hope, as you can guess.  I have heard that a second funeral after your child has died, can be double the intensity, and the months following could be a surprising downturn in energy and mood.  Maybe if I expect the worst, then it won't happen.  Either way, it doesn't hurt to let people know that there may be a need that they could fill.